Coming Home

I don’t know how I feel about war . . .

I take that back. I think injustice needs to be fought against; crimes, punished; freedom, upheld; mercy, throughout.

I received a text today saying that a friend from high school in the military was injured by an IED. He suffered a severe leg wound.

It was surreal. I had just gotten off of work. It was a long morning; I was exhausted, angry, relieved. I was not looking forward to the walk home (uphill) and was looking forward to the shower that would follow. I was thinking about events of the morning. Grinning at the good, furrowing my brow at the bad. I pondered what might be for lunch, to cook? to go out?

Then this text from my dad. he didn’t know anything else. just the injury.

I had not seen or spoken to this friend for almost 3 years. I knew he was advancing and doing very well in the military. He was going to lead other men into what-did-not-sound-like-altogether-safe missions.

I read about his deployment on his wife’s (also a high school friend) facebook page. I recently saw some of the many many pictures that new moms post of their children. Their daughter must be around 3 months old.

And this text, I think about it and the possible outcomes . . . well really the worst case scenario. A sinking feeling in my stomach comes.

I only saw them once since high school, at another friend’s wedding. They were older and married now. They danced and laughed together. They argued over things that only couples in a long term relationship would deem worthy enough to argue over. They were confident and happy. I was happy to see them and be around them.

I don’t want anything bad to happen to that family.

I had a conversation in my head with my soldier friend shortly after reading the text message. I thank him for what he was risking and the sacrifices that he and other women and men are making/have made to right injustice and uphold freedom.

From there, I wondered what I thought about war. I don’t know if any good comes from war, if killing solves things, if politics dictate more than justice does . . . if I am thankful for what my friend does versus what my friend’s intentions are as he does them.

So today I have also been thinking about and evaluating my stance on war. I want my friend to be with his family.

I hate war.